Well today was an eventful day. After only getting two hours of sleep last night from spiritual warfare, I woke up so tired and exhausted both mentally and physically. I didn't know how to handle myself and the last thing I wanted to do was stay at home. So I went to church with one of my best friends Dessi. It was good to get out in a place to worship the Lord. Both today and yesterday I have been so thirsty for it. Ive been so in love with my Father. I have been praying for motivation in my life not only with school, but also with keeping connected with the Lord and persevering in finding him even when I have nothing or am content with my life. These past couple days the Lord has been molding my heart to be the girl He made me to be and im so excited to see how that is going to play out. Our God is so awesome, flawless, caring, loving, forgiving, and so much more. I am yearning to become more like him. When people say my name I want them to be like oh shes different and so Christ like. It amazes me how hard it is to follow these character traits sometimes though. It looks so easy but living in such a corrupt world makes it so hard. It seriously blows my mind how loving our God is. We seriously fail him so many times in a day and hes still there with open arms and waiting for you to run back. I continue to ask the Lord for Him to reveal himself to me, and last night He definitely did by helping me sleep, even though it was only for two hours he still defeated the enemy when I couldn't fight anymore. That's another thing I learned a lot from last night, the Lord will never put us through things we cant handle. I think its cool that the Lord knows my heart so well that he is able to judge what I can and cant take on my plate. So after church I went to Olive Garden with the Concepcions and we had a great time! It made me so homesick though and I definitely miss my family so much more! I am so blessed to be put here where I can be loved on and taken care of though. I have so many people who genuinely care about me and they have showed it to me in ways I cant even explain lately. The Lord has seriously revealed miraculous things to me this past 24 hours. He gave me conformation on who my husband will be and gave me peace about the situation. I just need to focus on God, school, and family right now before I can get into anything serious though. I know we can make it because he is such a great leader and I just continue to pray that one day too I can be on his level spiritually. I know that I am only 19 and I still have a lot of maturing to do but I am ready for the changes to be made. Im not sure what I have planned for the rest of the night but I know im going to bed early since I have class at 8 am. I might have a longboarding sesh with my roommates and maybe work off all that Olive Garden I had today but who knows? ANyways gonna go get some shut eye to make up for last night!
Keep me in your prayers and thoughts,
Mel
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